Why I don’t like work social events

Like many people, I’m not good at small talk.

My brain often works too slow in these situation, which means that I can’t think of the things to say quick enough, and by the time I have, it’s often too late. This inevitably leads to periods of silence, even with people I spend forty hours a week alongside.

But the fact that I’m rubbish at small talk means, stick me in a room of work colleagues, with a bottle of beer in my hand and ask me to mingle, I’ll struggle and start working out at what time I might be able to sneak away to the safety of the train home. I know I’m not alone in this thought.

None of this is a reflection on my work colleagues. Most of them over my career have been nice, with the odd exception (if I’ve worked with you before then I’m obviously not talking about you. I’m talking about someone else).

It’s also not a reflection on how friendly I am. I like people and can happily chat with the small collection of folk that I’m comfortable with, or can talk with a wider bunch of people about work nitty gritty.

It just means I struggle with socially mixing.

So why attend company social events?

I know the benefits that businesses get from effective teams, and know that taking steps to bring people together will have allow the business to reap rewards down the line.

A study into engagement in the workplace by Gallup found that only 13% of employees actually classed themselves as being ‘engaged’ at work, and the impact of this lack of engagement can be linked directly to the performance of the business.

As such, a social event can be part of a wider strategy to get more engagement from teams, by making the workplace more interesting and for showing teams that their efforts are being acknowledged.

They’re also an opportunity to get teams better connected and break down some barriers. That could be across teams or even between leadership groups and employees, but either way, social activities humanise people and take roles and responsibilities out of the equation. It’s amazing how the dynamics can change if you get drunk with the CEO.